Do men really pretend they want a relationship when they are looking for sex? Isn’t that kind of mean? Nobody who truly loves themselves, who is at peace with oneself will ever want to hurt another, I do know this but before we deal with that let’s answer this question for you.

Here is what you need to know………

Only a man dating from hurt will do this

Men also get bad role models growing up, screwed up childhoods, fear of rejection, they are shy, and get bad advice and date from a place of hurt, just like you. When a man dates from a place of hurt he is not in the mental space in his mind to give you what you need…. a loving, supportive and committed relationship. A man who dates from hurt might just want to play around for a while; he could have had the ex-wife from hell. Young men will play around, let them…

It is your job to figure out what is your part to play in all of this.

A better question to ask is why am I only attracting men that just want to use me for sex? And what am I willing to do about it? What is your pattern?

Are you dating from hurt?

The solution to every problem in life and the power always lives inside of you, bottom line. What’s your story, your pain or your fear? Did you have an unhappy childhood, did some guy screw you over, are you afraid of getting hurt again?  What are you afraid of? Is it intimacy, commitment or that you don’t think you are good enough to have a great guy? What is stopping you from picking good men? Answer this question?

And what is your reason?

I hate to be harsh but we can live in our story, our fear and our pain for as long as we choose too. As some point you must understand you must make a positive step in the right direction for you. An act of self-love is confirming to yourself that will you will no longer tolerate men who treat you badly or use you for sex. You will get the education or know how to change your circumstances. There are a ton of resources out there and when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. So what are you going to do about it? How are you going to change your ways so this is not your story anymore?

Screen early

A guy always communicates his intentions to you through his actions and his words. And if you know what to look for, you will never date a guy again who tells you he wants a relationship but then you end up his sex buddy. Any man who is pushy, tells you he not ready for a relationship right now, says he wants fun, talks about his ex-too much or does not go out of his way to be with you has communicated what he wants from his time with you.

And if you want a crystal clear answer to his intention just read my article “When should I sleep with him”, how to ask is all in there for you.

Change how you think

If you think all men are cheaters, liars and are only after one thing, well that is what you will get because our brains are very clever and whatever you focus on your brain finds the evidence to support your belief. So in order to get a great guy you need to give up the old habits and start some new ones…… like seeing good in men, allowing a man to treat you well, enjoying their company, being loving and fun to be with, trusting him. Once you do this you will get a man who will be loving, supportive and committed to you.

Change how you date

I talked earlier about screening so you get rid of the wrong guy fast, you also must know how to treat a guy well so he wants to be with you. If you want the great guy then you need to think about who you are being in every moment. Are you open and approachable, are you appreciative, do you make a guy feel good in your company; do you allow a man to step up and want to be yours? Do you know how to make a man want you?

Because the answer is never sitting in our pain, it is in gaining the knowledge, practicing the skills and doing what you need to be the kind of woman every man wants. Grow yourself past your pain, past your excuses and into a new loving, supportive committed relationship with a great guy.

Sharing the secrets of men, love and relationships, so you too can succeed in love. Lorna is a dating coaching helping women like you get RESULTS, the guy you have always wanted completely head over heels in love with you. Grab your FREE Cheat Sheet here…. 15 Fun & Flirty Conversation Starters That Get The Hot Guy To Notice You!

 

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