You have met a really likeable guy online, you have been on several dates with him, yet you are unsure if he is seeing other women? How do you handle this, especially now that you feel you would like your relationship with him to develop into something more.
Usually, the evidence is everywhere
Usually, when a guy is dating other women you can tell. His dates with you are not regular, his contact with you between the dates is not regular, he has not taken his profile down after several dates together or even months. He has not asked for a commitment and you are sleeping with him. The dates are fantastic, but the periods in between dates are not so good. He is distracted by his phone, secretive about his whereabouts.
Most men will tell you what they want, it is what you do with the information which is the crucial part. Men tend to let you know what they want with either their words or their actions. In fact the mistake most women make is unless a man says “ I don’t want to be in a relationship with you”( which btw they rarely do!) they don’t believe the guy really wants out even thought his actions are obvious. A lot of men will go along with things till you pipe up because he can. He got away with it.
A man who disappears has told you you what he wants. A man who says “I just want fun”, “I am not looking for anything serious”……just substitute the word for sex, it means the exact same thing. A man who meets you with a ten day gap, is either too busy to be with you or is maybe juggling more than just you.
Now, we don’t enter every relationship with suspicion but we add up the evidence are they plus or minus?
Ask him what he wants
Before you get all panicked about what I am telling you here, it is always best to have a conversation before you jump to any self-made assumptions. Know what you want before you ask, so you can communicate it to him with ease, if the conversations falls that way.
The next time you are with a guy you like that you want something more with. Just gently bring it up in conversation. Just say, “I know we have been spending a lot of time together, do you mind me asking are you looking for a long-term relationship with someone or have you other plans?” Keep it general, it’s not about you. Just get the info
Pause, and let him answer. Usually once asked men tend to tell you their truth. He will say I am or he will say not right now. Make sure his actions back up his words.
Are you being true to you?
Remember to always be clear before you get involved with someone about what you want. If you want a guy who is relationship ready, pick a relationship ready man!
So if you like him and all the evidence is pointing the fact that he is seeing other women from either his actions or his words. Then you know what you need to do.
Pick relationship ready men
The relationship ready man is not the guy who acts like your boyfriend but does not commit, it is not the guy who disappears when you ask for more. He is not the guy who has just left his wife and tells you he was never in love with her in the first place.
Relationship ready guy is ready to meet you. It is easy, it feels good, you are attracted to him, he equally attracted to you, it feels right.
Lorna is a dating coach helping women like you succeed in love. Get your copy of 7 Surefire Signs The Guy You Are With Wants A Long-Term Relationship With You here.